A couple of fine weekends ago, it was a magical day for sport enthusiasts. It just so happened to be the day of one of if not the largest sporting event in south-eastern Australia: The AFL 2010 Grand Final between the Collingwood ‘Magpies’ and the St Kilda ‘Saints’.
Now, everybody enjoys a good sporting event as much as they do a good _insert personal favourite pass-time_. Personally, I hate AFL. I think it’s one of the worst sports in the world with no real on-field organization, and it really fits with the saying “a bunch of Neanderthals beating the shit out of each other over a piece of pig leather”. The ruckus that ensues after the initial ‘bounce’ is disgraceful even for those with a clear lack of coordination – see Cerebral Palsy. But that argument is for later… my gripe is with the way the official Grand Final(s) were played out.
Put the following picture in your head (unless you’ve got a picture of Megan Fox making out with Scarlet Johannsen – cause in that case, don’t ruin it): You’ve kept your weekend clear. You postponed the family reunion, and you cancelled your dog’s vasectomy. The lawn will NOT be mowed this weekend. This 48 hour time slot is for the preparation, enjoyment and recovery from what will be ‘Your Team’s Grand Fucking Final. The one, the only, the _insert team mascot species here_! This weekend your club will lift the legendary time honoured silverware with true passion… OR… you will cry, and hurt as you watch with sympathy and empathy for your club. You know your work colleagues will poke you for weeks and months to come. The off-season will be filled with anguish and pain that only your fellow club fan mates understand.
Well, guess what? That’s not going to happen, no fucking way. Cause here, down in redneck central, we’re going to pretend that the game never happened; See you next week!
My first major ball-breaker issue here is: in what messed up realm does any Final of any magnitude end in a draw? On what God forsaken planet can a sport finish with neither the triumph of victory, nor the heartache of defeat? You have got to be kidding me!
My second major testicle-masher issue is: How disgraceful – no matter how ridiculous the sport is in the first place – do you have to be as the director of a sport federation / association / whatever to make the call to then abuse this outrageous rule and make even more money than no man ever deserves. Let me break that down for you – because that was a hell of a mouthful.
What kind of a douche bag do you have to be as director to demand that these loyal fans and enthusiastic spectators purchase already overpriced and impossibly difficult to obtain tickets for a second time. What about those families with kids that have sport literally fused to their bones. They have a football stitched into their palms and they’ve scratched their team’s logo into the scab. These kids look up to these football stars as idols and then better themselves and their lifestyle by following in their footsteps of greatness. What if hard-working Dad had to save up all year to afford to take his big Magpie or Saints fan son to the Grand Final to have him forever remember the feeling of the aforementioned glory / horrible crushing sensation of defeat?
The way I see it, any body that was lucky / fortunate / diligent enough to obtain tickets to the first AFL 2010 Grand Final, should have their tickets valid for the next week’s showing. But instead, these greedy shit stains up in the corporate box are so happy with the draw, as they’ll be rolling in their shitty cash in the millions.
The purpose of those tickets was to watch your team lift the cup, or to regretfully watch your opponents do it. You (probably) paid money for this feeling, good or bad, and due to a great-game-to-watch draw, you won’t get to experience it. The effort you put in during the game to cheer and barrack for your team or player has been completely put to waste, because guess what? Some other random and quite possibly less-interested geezer is going to have your seat. Might even be one of those annoying fat bastards who contributed to 4 or 5 of those 60,000 meat pies sold on the day.
Putting all these factors together, all I can say is…
Come on… Seriously? Two Grand Finals?….
Come on... Seriously? 
Yes- a draw does leave a really hollow feeling (but better than a loss), in fact it’s quite a unique feeling. I would much rather they play a replay than extra time. Reasons being 1. in the second week, all the corporates have been there done that and there are a lot more tickets available to the real fans of the teams – the ones who missed out the first time round because of the corporates that go because they got a freee ticket from someone trying to schmooze them and suck up to them to get more business & who don’t really care about the outcome; 2. i love footy and any excuse to see more games; 3. I i didn’t support one of the teams, it’s a great weekend to have another bbq with mates, drink beers, watch the game – what could be better doing that 2 times in 2 weeks; 3. If you support the winning team it makes the feeling of winning even better and the misery of the hated opposition evn greater!
Hey Stevan,
You’re right, I actually have to agree with you on a couple of points; firstly, I agree the corporates / freebies don’t particularly deserve a second showing over a legitimate passionate fan that missed out.
Secondly, from a neutral point of view, I thoroughly enjoyed the second BBQ – great day!
I still disagree however that there is a replay for a drawn grand final. I mean, it’s barely ‘final’ by definition is it? It wasn’t called the ‘AFL 2010 Penultimate Final’…
Thanks for the comment,
Jeff*